The Offense of Being Offended: Why Not Rather Be Wronged?
Text: 1 Corinthians 6:7
Why not rather be wronged?
All we hear is noise and we never listen.
Cluck. Click. Cluck. Click. Cluck. Say this aloud a few times. The words break down and all you hear are odd sounds. No meaning. Nothing.
This is the atmosphere we breath today. Noise. No meaning.
Whatever it is in our brains that turns sound into meaning is broken, or turned off, or lies sleeping in the affected silence of ignored white noise that forms the background sound effects of our lives.
At least, that’s the way it often feels to me. I hear a lot, and constantly, but I rarely take the time to truly listen to anything or anyone anymore. Even as I write this I have music sounding, a YouTube video playing, the laundry machine running, and, of course, the game on TV.
Noise. But hearing nothing.
And yet, it is not the noise that drowns out my hearing. It is, as seems always the case when I notice a flawed behavior, me and only me.
More specifically, it’s my pride. My inflated sense of self. It is me saying to myself that I’m the only self I need to hear – and I hear THAT loud and clear.
Pride is the root of all sin, and I am beginning to believe the cause of all moral deafness as well. I know this because when I am offended at the words or actions of another, when someone hurts my pride, I instantly stop listening and shut any conversation down.
But pride, this kind of self-inflating pride, that takes my own concerns over another’s – friend or enemy – is not a Christian disposition. In fact, it is the first and last barrier to my becoming a disciple of Jesus Christ.
This is why Jesus said the first step to becoming a disciple is to ‘deny yourself.’ Only then can you hear the call of the cross and the voice of Jesus in order to follow him.
This is why Paul said that if we are to be truly ‘in Christ’ that we must not do ‘anything for selfish purposes, but with humility think of others as better than yourselves. Instead of each person watching out for their own good, watch out for what is better for others.’ (Phil 2:3-4) And in so doing we take on the very ‘mind of Christ,’ who rather empty himself of being God for us than grasp anything for himself.
And, this is why Paul told the Corinthians, when they were wrapped up in prideful disputes, ‘why not rather be wronged?’ Or, to paraphrase, why do you care if you are offended? Is it your pride or self or concern that is on the line here?
If I am disciple of Jesus Christ, the kind of pride I cling to is not an option. It is the dying shockwave of a dead self, and it deafens me to the voice and concern of both God and neighbor.
If I am a disciple of Jesus Christ, being offended is never the faithful response to another, even if I don’t agree – even if their intent was to offend me. Offense is a pattern of the world, and I long for the renewed mind of Christ.
I am far from this reality. But in the meantime, I must learn to set my pride aside, refuse the offense, and listen to the words and concerns of others.
It’s the only way to achieve true peace, the only way to hear the words of Christ, and the only way to give the ‘click cluck click’ the meaning of one who is loved and who loves in return.
